Advent and Christmas are beautiful, holy seasons, but incredibly busy for every mom. How do you handle all the extra ‘work’ that goes along with this season and avoid exhaustion, stress, and post holiday burnout?
I try extra hard to take some "selfish" time to pray, go for a walk, or a hot bath and about once a week I allow myself a 1/2 hour nap!! It is hard with all of the holiday food but I try to eat well! I enlist the help of the kids. Sometimes it is easier to do things yourself and the slight sigh (or sometimes not so slight) that comes when asking makes it harder to ask...but do it anyway! Pope John Paul would be proud of you that you are giving your children an opportunity to make a sincere gift of self! I try to do something fun and something Christ centered or Sacramental each week to set this time apart as holy. Last but not least, with so many car trips and service projects, we sing Christmas Carols at the top of our lungs continuing well into mid or late January!
Donna F.
This year we are doing less school work than usual in December, and using the time to run errands, do Christmas shopping, make cards and cookies, etc. We have fewer outside commitments, although we may have an impromptu field trip to a museum some day soon just to get out of the house for a day.
I rearranged our school Christmas break schedule this year, to give us more days off before Christmas. That was a last-minute change I just decided on this week, looking at everything I need to do before we leave town on December 22nd.
We are doing lots of seasonal reading as a family. We are using mostly picture books from the library. Some good authors to check out are Tomie de Paola and Jan Brett.
I am doing less baking. I decided this year just to make sugar cookies (and lots of them!) instead of trying to make six different kinds of cookies all at once.
Thanks for coming up with such a great question, I'm looking forward to reading the rest of the responses in the Mantle.
Blessed Advent,
Mary Ann B.
Personally, I can never seem to escape the stressed feeling that comes with the extra demands of preparing for Christmas. My stress starts when extended family members ask for a list of gift ideas for our children in October. I just can't imagine one other toy or item in our home. We just finished several birthdays and will gear up for a wave of more in January.
Anyways, we have a few traditions that help us spread out the flurry of activity in our home.
I write and send out our Christmas cards after Christmas during the Christmas season. Sometimes I don't even get to mailing presents to out-of-town family until Christmas Eve or after. The post office informs me the packages won't be there for Christmas but in my mind I feel secure that they will arrive during the Christmas season.
I make a list of "spring cleaning" chores like dusting the ceiling corners (to get all the cobwebs), washing walls, cleaning the fridge, microwave and stove, washing cupboard shelves, and cleaning out our silverware drawers...anything I have wanted to clean but had no time to do it..it goes on my list. I assign a small monetary amount to each job according to the time and energy it takes to do a good job and the children tackle them. This helps me and the children earn money for their gift giving or savings.
Our vacation begins the week before Christmas to bake, clean, make gifts, etc. Everything does not always get done. There comes a point when I just have to say, "we've done our best and we are done."
Works of mercy are always uplifting to my soul and encourage me to keep going during this time also. It is always amazing how time seems to multiply when I fit something like that into my busy plans. This helps me to remember that God is the creator of everything, even time!
A blessed Advent to you all! Maybe I will bump into you at the post office December 26th!
Karen S.
In answer to your question: I try very hard to keep Advent as Advent. So many want to celebrate Christmas well before the 25th of Dec. Advent is a time for waiting, hope and expectation. In a letter to my mother's church, her pastor said that during Advent, there should not be even a hint of Christmas (decorating, celebrating etc). We do this by waiting to decorate and get a tree. I am holding out on my baking until the week before Christmas. Although I am picking up a few extra items when I shop, I am not going overboard on gifts or fancy food. We have had several opportunities to go to beautiful musical presentations and have enjoyed them.We also listen to good Christian Christmas music but that is all we are doing. The waiting and praying and anticipation of Christmas is important. We have an Advent wreath that we light each night at dinner and someone reads a special prayer. The kids also have Advent calendars(Catholic ones). We also read more about this season.We are going to a penance service and go to confession regularly and pray the Rosary etc.
When my sister's kids were little she used to stay up late Christmas Eve and put the tree up all by herself. She really held out until Jesus was born!!! A great idea!!! We also do a little more volunteer work for the poor at this time and make donations.
I hope this gives you some insight as to what our family does for Advent. I am looking forward to seeing what other families do.
God Bless, Paula S.
The next answer is from Lois Z.
Here's our answer for this..... most years it works!
Sometimes we learn how not to do things from our parents. Such is my case. The key to not burning out is planning things ahead of time to the best of your ability.
My own mom would do EVERYthing last minute, from getting things straightened up to cooking the day of the holiday, whether it was Thanksgiving or Christmas or summer picnics. Mom could never enjoy the meal she worked so hard to prepare. She never had time to get herself fixed up, often coming to dinner in an old beat up housedress and apron. Just before dinner, she splashed water on her red face, combed her hair and sometimes she remembered to remove the apron. She always looked exhausted, frenzied and hoping she remembered everything she was supposed to cook!
After I got married I realized that life didn't have to be so rushed, that I didn't have to look like I'd just come out of the blender and that *I*, too, could enjoy my meal and my guests.
This, however, did require a bit of advance work.
For Christmas, with regard to gift giving, this means finding things during the year that you know Aunt Debbi or Gram or the kids may like for gifts. This requires listening skills to see what is going on in each of their lives. Did Debbi talk about someday planting bulbs? Did Gram wistfully talk about wanting to write her memoirs? When bulbs go on sale, you can pick some up for her and get Gram a few journals, a few pens or perhaps a tape recorder! Those can be purchased ahead of time. This also helps the budget in that the expense is spread out over a few months instead of just in November or December.
One Christmas, my mother came into our home and asked me how I got everything done. The house was perfect, the table set with requisite floral arrangement and candlesticks and the food smelled great! I was dressed to the nines in my sequinned sweater, snazzy slacks, fresh makeup and hair done. Ted was equally dressed to the nines, but .. well, without the sequinned sweater.. <
I informed her that had she gone to a restaurant, it was quite possible that they didn't cook the turkey just before she arrived. Catered affairs are generally not prepared the day of the event. (and twelve hours did not make the difference as it sat in the fridge) Our food was just as fresh, just as tasty and served piping hot to our table. She never said a word after that but enjoyed the unrushed pace at our table.
For us, the Christmas tree, an artificial one, is put up traditionally the day after Thanksgiving. The Nativity set, advent wreath, etc are put up at this time as well. We do no outside lights, but do decorate our windows with either painted snowflakes or cut outs. Some years we do all the windows. (this year we missed some)
The past few years, the girls have taken charge of the tree and I have to admit, they've got the Martha Stewart touch just like dear old mom. I put up garlands and many of the other decorations, but it is done well in advance. We've gone to a more simplistic feel with less but a more striking decor. Final touches on the house with regard to dusting and cleaning are performed a few days before Christmas. (unless the birds are particularly messy, requiring a quick vacuum)
The family newsletter, dubbed, 'Lois' Christmas Epistle to the Unfortunate', is begun in October, with final touches going into it for last minute news just before it gets printed. (this year it is a 15 page novella) Holly designed our cards with photos from throughout the year and they are printed from our computer. In years past, the Christmas cards went out the day before Thanksgiving so recipients could receive them the day after. In recent years, we have been later--this year they went out December 10th. (still acceptable to me)
I give fudge for many gifts, and that is done usually the week before Christmas. Fifty or sixty pounds can be prepared in one day. The following day it is cut and put into tins, on plates and ready to be delivered or mailed to people. Cookies, if we are in the mood to bake, are done the same week. Gifts are wrapped weeks in advance. Cookies can be done a month in advance. My cousin is a professional baker begins her hundreds of dozens of orders after Thanksgiving and freezes them.
Going to Mass is the high point in our celebration and having everything prepared in advance makes for an even more enjoyable and joyous event.
The last thing I firmly believe in is.....
VITAMINS.